Mercedes Perales

WHAT DO YOU LOVE MOST ABOUT BEING YOUR AGE?
Everything I wanted to do, I’ve done. I have the career; I’m at a place where I’m not sure when I’m going to retire because I love what I do; I’ve done my job since I graduated in ’88. My children are grown; they’re wonderful girls, and I have a wonderful family. And I have a good relationship with my family and friends.

I bought the house. I used to drive by and say that one of these days, that will be my house. Now I’m looking forward to traveling more, so that excites me. I don’t have to worry about the what-ifs; I have accomplished everything I set out as a goal.

WHAT HARDSHIPS HAVE YOU ENDURED THAT YOU FEEL HAVE MADE YOU STRONGER?
When you move from one country to another as a child, you lose all your friends. I learned what bullying was when I moved to Mexico. I was bullied because I was Puerto Rican and because I talked differently. I was going to an all-girls school and had to maneuver that. When we moved to Mexico, my parents bought me this nice luggage set; it was Samsonite. We got from the island to Mexico City, and I saw it coming down and I said: “wow, look there’s my luggage” and I had my precious possessions there. My classmates made a little, you know, going away thing with photos and notes, and I had it there, but that was the last time I saw it. When we got to Guadalajara, all I had was what I had on: my purse, a toothbrush, and one pair of extra underwear. I learned that it’s not your possessions that are important; it is having the family and the loved ones that you know are there with you; they’re constant in your life.

I moved here and had to start over. You keep some friendships, but only some people who say I’ll call you will do this. Back then, we didn’t have the opportunities for communication that we have now. Being flexible, starting over, meeting new people, and enjoying people. Enjoy your reality for today, to worry about what’s not there anymore. That made me stronger. I also learned there are good people and beautiful places everywhere, which has allowed me to have a more open mind about people, places, and life.

WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER YOUR GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT?
Being a mom is my greatest achievement. I have my career, but being a mom has been the most magical. I grew up in the church; my grandfather was a minister, and I thought I understood the love of God. I didn’t know until I had my children how you can so profoundly love someone that you would do anything for them.

WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST EXTRAVAGANCE?
That little toy outside, my red sassy Mercedes, I love it! When I take the car for maintenance, I see white, black, and silver cars, and then there’s red. It flies when you need it to fly, and I’ve added a little bling to it. That’s my biggest extravagance.

WHAT IS YOUR MOST TREASURED POSSESSION?
I have a Rolex watch with my name engraved on the back. My parents gave it to me for my birthday, which is my most precious possession.

WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE THING YOU HAVE CHECKED OFF YOUR BUCKET LIST?
Going to Europe, I went to Spain, and I’ve been to Italy twice. And I’m going to Greece soon.

WHAT IS YOUR IDEA OF PERFECT HAPPINESS?
Being healthy, and being able to do the things that I want to do.

My mode of transportation on medical school campus was a skateboard, before skateboarding was popular. I went everywhere on that skateboard. That’s not for me anymore, but I can do almost everything I want to do.

I love to dance. Being physically healthy is important to me. I want to be here for my kids. I had them when I was older, and I have a responsibility to them, which is the other reason I have been on my health journey.

WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE YOUR YOUNGER SELF?
I’ve always been so driven. I would tell myself: relax, it’s going to be ok. You’re a hard worker; everything works out, don’t be so serious.

DO YOU HAVE ANY WORDS OF WISDOM FOR YOUNGER WOMEN?
Be authentic. Think about what you want in life, not just with your career. Where do you want to be, what do you want to experience, and what qualities are you looking for in a partner? And go for it. Communicate, be honest, be grateful, but be a go-getter. You cannot get to your destination if you don’t have the goal. You have to work hard for anything worth having.

WHAT IS A TRAIT YOU ARE MOST PROUD OF?
Being smart, I don’t give up, and I am a hard worker.

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO OR FAVORITE QUOTE?
Don’t worry, be happy. Make it simple. Break it into pieces and go from there. And take care of yourself, love yourself.

WHAT DO YOU MOST VALUE IN YOUR FRIENDS?
Honesty and consistency: if you say you will do something, do it. I’m old-fashioned; what I have is my word. If I tell you I will do something, I will break my neck doing it. I expect the same.

HOW DID YOU CHANGE OVER THE YEARS?
The biggest thing is that I take more time for myself now, I have more fun now that I have time to do so. Now that I have more time, I try not to worry as much. I work a lot; most people know me by being a workaholic. I’ve been so driven, first you have your career, then the girls. The girls have been very busy with drama, band, sports, and running from one activity to the next. Now, they live far away, in Hawaii and Knoxville. I will take their call any day, any time. The same goes for my parents and siblings; they’ll have access to me 24/7.

WHAT DO YOU HOPE FOR THE FUTURE GENERATIONS?
I would like young people to have more options. This generation is struggling, even with a career and even with a degree. I see it more now than in the past. I would like them to have the same benefits and not struggle as they are now.

I would like things to be easier, and I think this generation is very stressed. I would like future generations to be more relaxed and spend more time with family. And the electronics, put them down, if you’re with your family, interact with them, play board games, go out and walk together, and do the nature stuff. I would like less electronics and more togetherness, fellowship, and connection.

WHAT BRINGS YOU THE MOST JOY AT THIS AGE?
My children give me the most joy. We have fun, we laugh, and we enjoy each other. I have good friendships, a sisterhood with other women, some younger than me and some older. We have that commonality of just enjoying each other’s company, going and being able to just enjoy nature.

WHAT IS YOUR SUPERPOWER?
Being laid-back is my superpower. One of my girls said one day, “Mom, you don’t take anything seriously,” and I said, “Ohh, yes, I do, but I laugh a lot.” I’m not afraid to try new things if I think they’ll be fun. If they work out great, and if they don’t, at least I tried them.

DO YOU LIKE BEING 40+?
With age comes a sense of acceptance; you know you accept yourself and others and don’t worry as much. You’re more mature and patient; for me, it’s all about living in gratitude and enjoying life. I’m living my best life now. Throughout my life, I dedicated myself first to my career; then, I dedicated myself to my children. It was all about them, and now it’s my time. With age comes that freedom, and now I can focus on hobbies, friendships, and traveling.

WHEN IN YOUR LIFE, SO FAR, HAVE YOU FELT MOST CONFIDENT, AND WHY?
Confidence comes with some practice and knowledge. I feel most confident now because I have a career. The children don’t come with instructions; they are really good people and know I love them unconditionally. They’ve both told me that, and that helps me feel like I’ve done my job. I’ve raised kids who are loving and good people. They give love and acceptance, and they go for their goals.

IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE YOU WOULD LIKE TO ADD?
I would like to have more time with my parents. The reality of where my parents are in their life journey is very present in my mind. I hate that I’m so far away.