Keisha Humphries

WHAT DO YOU LOVE MOST ABOUT BEING YOUR AGE?
I get to be me; I don’t have to worry about what everybody else thinks. It’s love me or leave me; I am me.

WHAT HARDSHIPS HAVE YOU ENDURED THAT YOU FEEL HAVE MADE YOU STRONGER?
Being a widow would be one. Being divorced with two babies and being a single Mama. Losing my mom.
That’s the biggest thing: losing family members. I feel a sense of responsibility to carry on the family traditions and make sure that my grandkids know who their grandparents and great-grandmother were.

WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER YOUR GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT?
The easy answer would be my kids. The second would be graduating with my master’s degree. Boys were a big deal when I was younger, and I didn’t do well in college. I had to reapply to get back into college and make somebody believe I could do it. I ended up going back. I graduated with my nursing degree, and then, with the help and support of my second husband, I got my bachelor’s degree and my master’s degree.

WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST EXTRAVAGANCE?
I love food, especially seafood. I love eating good food, cooking, and trying new things. It’s a big deal.
The other thing is my fingernails, which I have to have done every three weeks. And my toes—I hate having man feet, so I have to have my toes done, too.

WHAT IS YOUR MOST TREASURED POSSESSION?
A picture of my grandparents’ farm where I grew up and spent the summers. It even shows the old well where I had to get the water. That’s my most prized possession. It would mean nothing to anyone but me.

WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE THING YOU HAVE CHECKED OFF YOUR BUCKET LIST?
I went to Europe this year for the first time; I went to Portugal.
I loved it; it was amazing. I can’t wait to go back. Next time, I don’t want to go on a tour; I want to return and enjoy the people. We went to seven different towns; Porto was one, and Nazarene by the sea. We went to Our Lady of Fátima, which was incredible. I love the people, the seafood, and the different cooking techniques. People would sit and talk to me about their different spices, which was just incredible. It was so relaxing; I loved it.
I want to see other countries, too, but boy, I love Portugal. I didn’t realize how many Americans live there when they retire because it’s so economical. They said real estate is the most expensive thing because Americans keep buying.

WHAT IS YOUR IDEA OF PERFECT HAPPINESS?
I have three different things that come to mind. One: I already have it because I’m living it with my grandkids and my kids. Having family dinners every Sunday; to me, that is perfect happiness when they all come over and I have 13 people in the house. Cooking dinner is another, and the last one is more simple: just having a cup of coffee on the back patio watching the sunrise.

WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE YOUR YOUNGER SELF?
Don’t worry so much about what everybody thinks; believe you have the right things in your heart.

DO YOU HAVE ANY WORDS OF WISDOM FOR YOUNGER WOMEN?
Enjoy your children while they’re in school. The job will still be there, and you only get so long with those babies, so enjoy the time with your children. Go to school plays, go to soccer games, and enjoy all that. Because once it’s done, it’s a little emptier without that.
Spend that time. I wish I had not put in so many late nights sometimes. I figured out it’s not about how long you work; it’s learning to work smarter, not harder. You could still do the work-life balance kind of thing. It took me a while to understand it.
There’s a different importance to that in Europe; I feel that they put more emphasis on the family and not the career.

WHAT IS A TRAIT YOU ARE MOST PROUD OF?
I hear ‘no’ a lot in my job, so my best quality is that I listen constructively to why I’m being told no and then figure out how to get a yes. It’s about compromising and maybe getting someone to see my vision of what it could be.

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO OR FAVORITE QUOTE?
It is what it is. I like that because it fits just about everything. This is life, and you must figure out how to deal with it, so it is what it is.

WHAT DO YOU MOST VALUE IN YOUR FRIENDS?
Honesty, without the filter, they will tell me when I am screwing up and what I’m doing well. For sure, there is no question about how they feel about something. Those are good friends.

HOW DID YOU CHANGE OVER THE YEARS?
I’m nicer and not as intense. I finally figured out that the sweeter you are, the more you enjoy your life.
I laugh more than I used to, and I don’t take life so seriously.

IF YOU COULD CHANGE ONE THING ABOUT YOURSELF, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Are we talking physically or mentally? I would change my nose; it’s just too long. I have my father’s nose, and I don’t like it.
I wouldn’t be so self-critical. Even when people say you’re doing enough, I never believe I’m doing enough, so that’s one thing I wish I could get rid of. I noticed that it gets a little bit better every year.

WHAT DO YOU HOPE FOR THE FUTURE GENERATIONS?
I hope that future generations learn how to communicate with each other. Most disturbances, or anger, all of it, is communication. Maybe we need to get to know each other and give each other a little grace. That’s what I wish they would do and be kind.

WHAT BRINGS YOU THE MOST JOY AT THIS AGE?
My four grandbabies—the smallest one is 3, and he’s a hellcat; he has no filter. And then the others are 11, 8, and 7. They’re amazing. I love them all. This weekend, I spent most of the weekend playing soccer or watching soccer games. Yeah, that’s cool; that’s my world.

WHAT IS YOUR SUPERPOWER?
My superpowers would be resilience and the power to believe that everybody is good. Those two things lead me to think everybody has something good in them.

DO YOU LIKE BEING 40+?
I do; I don’t have to worry about the rat race so much. I’m confident in what I know, I’m confident in the job I do, and I’m confident in myself. I don’t have to have those nasty periods anymore or any of that, and I don’t have to worry about having babies anymore; I love it. I went to get something today, and somebody said ohh, I’m on my period, and I’m like, oh, you poor thing, I feel sorry for you, and I’m just so thankful I don’t have it.

WHEN IN YOUR LIFE, SO FAR, HAVE YOU FELT MOST CONFIDENT, AND WHY?
Right now. I figure if I’ve survived losing my mother and my husband, I got this.

IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE YOU WOULD LIKE TO ADD?
Joining the 40 over 40 Project is probably one of the scariest things I’ve ever done. I don’t normally dive into something like this. It’s not about the kids; this is about me, and that’s really odd for me. It’s something I needed to do to prove to myself that I made it and that I got through this.